I DETEST my medical school but not my medical education

Hey Y’all.

Sorry it has been awhile since my first official post. Between those times I have debated on what I would speak upon next. Would it be black issues, would it be how I feel like this new make up trend (the highlight and contour) is causing my black sisters to neglect their skin health ( I have a theory that the use of make up excessively leads to breakouts, clogged pores and overall congestion of the skin). I’ve also been experiencing a severe need to address what has been bothering for some time now: my complete and utter disgust of my medical school from my classmates up to the administration.

So let’s talk sis. As a black person in medicine you most certainly need tough skin. However, tough skin is the least of your concerns when it comes to tolerating the bullshit that goes on at my school on the daily.

We probably all remember how we felt on November 9th when we realized who exactly was going to be our 45th president (out of respect for Pres. Obama and the black community, I will refer our current president as 45). I have had several classmates who I mistakenly considered friends who balled (and I mean BAWLEDDD) their eyes out and took this man’s presidency very, very hard. I personally believed that this was exactly what America gets for (both conservatives and liberals) not taking the value of black lives seriously enough to do much about it. I felt like our issues were exploited and our pain was monetized off of via the media and while our issues still persist have y’all noticed that since 45 our issues have not been very well publicized.

So how does this relate to medical school? Well I was in a meeting with these same students I just mentioned, a few Muslim students and a few Barack Obama supporters. In this meeting I was the only one vocal about the concerns of those very same students and I was the only one who spoke about solutions that the school could accomplish to alleviate these issues. What was frustrating was that I was getting so much push back for my ideas and solutions from the VERY SAME PEOPLE who cried their eyes out about the election results. This put me in a conundrum. I was like why the FUCK am I wasting my time at a meeting discussing positive changes at a school that would directly benefit multicultural students and I am getting push back from multicultural students.

It’s because this is medical school, it’s not reflective of real life. Medical students (at least at my school) are some of the most self-serving, selfish, non-compassionate motherf’ers  that I have ever experienced. What’s crazy about this is that these are the people who are going to be treating Y’ALL when Y’ALL get sick. We are taught at our school the words to say to fake compassion which we use on one another daily( well they do, not me).

My school is run by old conservative white men and fearful liberals and it is infuriating. When I first started attending the school we were at a very competitive rank but have since dropped 14 SPOTS. My school is fucking TRASHHHHH.

However, It is survivable. The positive things about my school are that my professors are amazing and there are MAD attractive people randomly walking all over the place. Another positive thing is that the name of the school will hopefully carry weight during my residency interviews if the school doesn’t damage it’s reputation anymore than it already has. Because I am a medical student at a US program I will not have any issues with residencies in my respective field. I am looking at Peds. I remind myself everyday how fortunate I am to be learning the things that I am learning and I know that I am doing what God truly intended me to do.

I really hope this school does not taint my good heart and my willingness to serve my community since everyday I am surrounded by people of color who are on the same path as me that could literally give a FUCK about black issues. I really pray that I don’t go through whatever they went through that made them hate themselves that much.

Also, I have advice if you are reading this and you are not in the medical field. Inevitably, you will have to get seen for a health ailment. Empower yourself! If you can find a physician or health care provider who is of your own race please do so because they most likely will probably treat you better. HOWEVER, if they don’t, empower yourself to know that you CAN (and hopefully your insurance allows) find someone better. It may be stressful but don’t let anyone get comfortable with making you feel less than regardless of if your health concern is big or small, find someone who genuinely cares about your needs.

 

Thanks for reading and remember please leave a comment if you feel compelled to do so!

 

My song for this blog post will be entitled MAD by Solange ft. Lil’ Wayne. Because being mad is OK. Hating your medical school is OK. But let it go so it doesn’t get in the way of your true vision.

 

Be BLESSED Y’all!

Welcome!

Hey Y’all!

I am so excited to be starting on this new endeavor and have sooooo many ideas and topics for future blog posts. So definitely keep posted! Head to my “About Her” section to get a sneak peek about what this blog will be about and a little bit more about me. This post will be a continuation of what was mentioned in that section (just an FYI).

So why start a blog? Well let’s talk sis! My true reasoning for starting this blog is based in the fact that I have some healing to do. This blog is for anyone who comes by and views it, but it’s mainly for my black brother’s and sisters. Black people in the United States are the strongest people that I have come across. I believe that we have endured injustice and inequality for far too long. Even more so, the ramifications of such inequality has completely destroyed are communities. As a medical student I know we are DYING at disproportionate rates from preventable ailments, more so than our white counter parts. I also know that this is due to things that are, for the most part wholly out of our control. I can show you facts that suggest that if a black woman, for example, does everything right (a quality education, the best health, the best socioeconomic status) her rates of birthing a healthy child that survives labor still doesn’t compare to her white counterparts. This should make you consider that something else is going on here.

I will be addressing the role that race and racism play on our overall  well-being head-the-fuck-on. I won’t sugar coat shit. However, I also will not be letting our community off the hook for are own issues that have been so pervasive and persistent as to damage the very people we claim we love. I will, however, acknowledge the impacts that slavery and being taught to hate ourselves play in these behaviors but if you think that I will use this as an excuse to justify this ongoing violence in our communities, think again.

So yes, I struggle with mental health issues. That will be something that I absolutely won’t shy away from talking about. Our community in general needs to start normalizing speaking about about mental health as well as things that we just are not okay with but have been taught to deal with. Because some of my symptoms cause me to be hyper-vigilant and irritable I will definitely have blog posts were I will be ranting/complaining (however this could also be because I have very high standards of other’s and myself so when things don’t go accordingly it’s hard for me to not get a little frustrated).

The reason why this blog has the word “anonymous” in it is because I will be going there as far as the topics that I talk about. When I talk about myself I will also go there. I mean getting to the very roots of the issue. So as to not have my impending medical school degree snatched away from me this blog has to be less about who specifically I am (as this relates to my name, age, and what school I go to). I will also be reading my school for filth quite a few times (so look forward to that lol I won’t say they’re name though, well I won’t try to at least lol).

I am a black female medical student and I am truly blessed to be allowed to do what I am currently doing. I will have future posts detailing the things that I am learning, how I study, and all that jazz (this however will NOT be the only things I blog about since I am more than just a medical student). Although I am young I have an extensive research background in the fields of public health, psychology, sociology, and evolutionary biology. Some of the top school’s in the country have fought to get me to conduct research at their institution (I’ll just shout out Harvard for putting me on that young waitlist). This is more than a humble brag, it is meant for my readers to understand how extremely dedicated, determined, and hard-working a person I am. The medical, beauty/health, and mental health blog posts I will be writing are going to be well thought out and based in their respective research settings. I am an intellectual, and I’m serious about my shit (word to Badu lol).

Another reason why this blog is anonymous is because I will be letting my viewers who struggle with financial insecurity know exactly how to transcend their circumstances. I truly believe you’re either pimping the system or getting pimped by the system. I also follow the motto “go for broke” meaning to play into certain stereotypes other’s have of you for your own benefit. I’ll let my readers know what’s up and how they can live their very best life via becoming a strategist and working hard. I’ll try not to break any laws in terms of the information or advice I give my readers but again either you’re pimping the system or getting pimped by it. It’s always your choice once you become enlightened what you chose to do.

I mentioned this in my “About Her” section but I am very bourgeoisie (boujee lol) but yet also very broke so I will share with yall how to live my lifestyle for the low. Like I mentioned in my “About Her” section, I eat lobster on the daily (quite literally, that and sushi is all I eat), I have clear skin (because I was blessed with it) but also because I get facials, chemicals peels, and microdermabrasion treatments at least twice a month. I have my own message chair, but I still get massages and acupuncture/cupping treatments and chiropractic alignments at least once a week along with pedicures and manicures. This isn’t to humble brag, again I believe that these things are vital to ones self-care regimen. So I will be definitely letting you guys in on how I am able to do all this (being broke as shit) and the best approaches to improving you self image (as that relates to clearer skin, straighter and whiter teeth, and a banging body).

 

I really want this blog to be as interactive as possible. I want you guys to tell me as much about you and your experiences as I tell you about mine. So please comment or connect with me via Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook (my Facebook page is still under construction). Let’s heal together. As I work through my traumatic life experiences I want my readers to have the courage to do so to. When I bring up future blog topics know that prior to writing a post I have done some significant research of my own. So let’s learn together! I want to know what your level of expertise is as well! This blog is also for the purpose of inspiring. When I tell you that I grew up not having a pot to piss in and now I am on a journey to becoming a physician, God is amazing (oh, and I will also be talking about my spiritual journey as well) and he will surely get you to where you need to be in life, so long as you believe. I think that I can help you and you may also be able to help me with this thing called life and how to heal, particularly in the climate that we are living in today (y’all do remember who are president is right? Stay woke!)

 

At the end of every blog post I will share a song that I encourage you all to listen to (it might be a little ratchet, but that’s just how I am sometimes lol) maybe I’ll give a brief sentence or two on why I am recommending it. Music saves man, it really does.

 

Music recommendation: Redbone – Childish Gambino

-I almost missed out on this song because of the title. I’m chocolate and have a real issue with colorism in our community so I thought this song was going to be some tom-coonery lol. But after listening to the song on the radio several times and thinking it was entitled “Stay Woke!” I looked up the lyrics and was smacked in the face with the fact that I had been ignoring this song every time I came across the title lol. Goes to show you, don’t judge a song by it’s title lol.  Listen to the song and love it, no need to explain why I chose this song first.

 

Be Blessed!